TaYLOr
Kitty Jay Speaks
Like a deer you have leapt, unexpectedly,
into the centre of a clearing in my head
and for the first time, I notice a path
through this dense little forest we’re in.
The small deer you have become
is wild as the breath of a wolf from a dream.
Is there a vixen out on the moor
that is howling now?
What little can I do, but mark such a crush
crossing out my maidenhood?
Give myself one moment more, to praise
the tangled depth of winter trees in your eyes.
One night, at last, you lay beside me
by the river’s mirror, when you had the green
of the wheat on your breath and I lashed it down.
Our act of love seemed pure as a jay’s wing.
Do not think I came to regret what I did,
as I hung there, swinging in the barn.
The soft heat of the wheat is still on my breath;
the green wheat is born to die.
They pierced what was left of me out of fear,
but I had no heart left to wander;
three parishes meet at my bed’s head and foot
and all the world seems to come to say sorry.
They lay the best flowers: carnations, pinks,
anemones, daffa-
in their season, even poppies made of silk
as heroes have laid on their graves.
See you, I have more; pennies, small as farthings
and bracelets for friendship, woven out of scarlet stuff.
They remember my name in an imprint of pebbles
out of that momentous stream we loved by.
If I had had such attentions when I was alive,
it would have been worth my while
to let the infant I was carrying, out into your world.
You scattered some gorse heads once, on my grave
and twice, I have felt a jay’s wing there, my sweet.
Did you know that I knew? Nobody noticed then,
how lightly I skipped down the path through the heather,
with my mouth full of kisses.
This poem was a winner in the University of Exeter ‘Hidden Histories’ project, coordinated by Writer in Residence, Greta Stoddart. A pamphlet featuring six poems from each of the Westernmost counties of Dorset, Devon & Cornwall was published in March 08. There will be a reading of poems from the project at Ways With Words Literature Festival at Dartington on 19th July 08 at 2.30pm